(LIFESTYLE)Eight Signs You Were Raised in a Dysfunctional Family

*What is a dysfunctional family?

Well, there is a huge span when it comes to the term 'dysfunctional'. It ranges from mildly dysfunctional to completely nuts.

There is really no guide when it comes to determining how dysfunctional a family is but, for the purposes of this article, we are leaning towards the 'completely nuts' end of the spectrum.

1. You feel guilty when you stand up for yourself. Do you buy something, get the incorrect change and assume it's your fault? Or, if someone steals your wallet, you feel like you did something wrong? A common sign you were raised in a dysfunctional family is when you assume you are in the wrong in situations that are clearly not your fault. Yet, you feel guilty for standing up for yourself.

2. You fear being abandoned. Many raised in a dysfunction family live in fear of being left behind. This is because you were often abandoned as a child. This can mean being left alone in a house, car or somewhere else on a regular basis. But it can also mean emotional abandonment. For instance, when your parents shamed you for things you said or did, they abandoned you. This includes harsh statements, being overly critical, sarcastic and issuing veiled jokes.

3. You're a people pleaser. This is usually a survival trait which develops as a result of being regularly abandoned. It's an attempt to disarm people when you fear their criticism. You forget who you really are and imbue yourself with a different persona. You harbour the belief that if you're nice enough, no one will abandon you. This trait was developed as a 'sixth sense' to be able to determine the mood of the adults around you and then respond appropriately.

4. You feel lonely and isolated. When you are raised in a dysfunctional family you often live with a secret inner fear. The fear is that it will be discovered you are a fraud and, once that's found out, you will be abandoned. You may feel deeply that you will be criticised and then be annihilated. It's amazing how many of us come across with enough bravado to throw everyone of the scent.

5. You worry incessantly about the future. Those raised in a dysfunction family try to control the future for two reasons: one, to try and make you feel safer knowing that your future is going to be OK and two, because sitting with yourself in this moment is extremely uncomfortable.

6. You feel super responsible for others. You believe it's your job to fix others. By doing this you are able to ignore your own discomfort because you're involved in others' chaos. You think you are 'living' when you really exist within a co-dependent framework. This enhances your fear of being abandoned because if that person disappears, who are you?

7. You feel like a victim. This rolls on from point two because it's the flip side. Behaving like a victim is a way of you trying to get your emotional needs met. When you roll up in a ball and plead for help, you think you are less likely to be abandoned. It's a powerful but manipulative way of asking for help. Those raised in dysfunctional families have a hard time asking for help in a direct and adult approach. This is because as children you were shamed for asking and you don't want to recreate those feelings.

8. You judge yourself mercilessly. This comes from being judged as a child: 'What, do you think I'm made of money?' - 'You are the most selfish child I know!' - 'You're never grateful for anything I do for you are you?' You have no other framework from which to function. At a deep level you believe you deserve it.

*NB - I include myself in this list!

(LIFESYTLE) How To Make Perfect Scrambled Eggs

So what's the technique?

Kickstart your delightful bit of brekkie by cracking open three farm fresh eggs into a bowl (if you can do it without getting rogue shell fragments in the mix then well done you).

The joy of going farm fresh is that you'll have super orange yolk, which results in a really healthy looking scrambled egg dish.

Meanwhile the trick to getting a fluffy texture is to incorporate air into the mix with a good bit of whisking. Put your back into it.

When it's all mixed together, and the egg whites and yolk have merged to create a runny orange substance, you will need to season with salt and pepper.

Next, grab a small nonstick skillet and put it on your hob on a low heat. Emphasis on the low heat. If you put it on a high temperature setting then you're going to end up with crispy-looking egg biscuits. And nobody has time for that.

Take a nob of butter and swirl around the pan, then add in your well-seasoned eggy mix.

Stirring the egg while it's in the pan is an important part of the process, although you'll have to watch the video to get to grips with the successful egg-swirling motion.

The final tip? Your eggs will continue to cook even when they're off the heat, so pull them off a little earlier.

Et voilà! Not a dry egg pancake in sight.

(Family/Lifestyle) CAN’T SLEEP BECAUSE OF HIS SNORING? HERE IS HOW TO STOP IT!

Most people don’t get enough sleep at night. For many people being sleep deprived means not functioning as well as they could be, but for millions of other people – mainly men – lack of sleep is a sign of a serious health condition.

People who are suffering from exhaustion, high blood pressure and inexplicable headaches are all showing symptoms of a sleep disorder called obstructive sleep apnea (OSA).

Why don’t people with OSA get the sleep that they need every night? The answer may surprise you—it’s snoring!

Snoring actually causes your man to wake up throughout the night. For most, snoring is simply a case of having to move their body from a bad position into one that’s more comfortable to breathe in. But for the 18 million people in the United States suffering from OSA, snoring is their body’s cry for help. Throughout the night, people with OSA literally stop breathing. They stop breathing because the muscles in their mouth, jaw, and throat relax, blocking the free flow of air in the airway. These moments of suffocation can last for up to an entire minute. A person with OSA wakes up hundreds of times during a single night as their bodies try not to suffocate. Snoring is actually your man’s body’s only way to get enough air to breathe.

The result is that when people with OSA get out of bed in the morning, they feel like they haven’t slept at all. And it’s true—they have not had a full sleep cycle. Not only are their bodies exhausted, they have opened up an entire range of new health problems that are associated with this extreme sleep loss, including heart attacks, depression, strokes, memory loss, acid reflux and diabetes.

In the past, there weren’t that many treatment options available for people with sleep apnea. They could go and get an expensive diagnosis, and then drop several thousand dollars visiting a sleep clinic that would require an annoying overnight visit. One of the possible outcomes for such patients would be having to strap themselves into a CPAP breathing device for the entire night—that’s one of those breathing masks attached to an explosive tank next to your bed. Or worse, they would have to undergo a painful and invasive surgery.

Luckily, all that has changed!

Now there is the chin strap by MySnoringSolution. It’s a comfortable and affordable treatment for OSA that keeps your man’s breathing passages open while he wears it in bed. This treatment method has been found to be effective in a recent study at the Eastern Virginia Medical School’s Division of Sleep Medicine and it is clinically tested and doctor approved. It works by keeping the jaw and tongue from loosening up, thereby keeping the airway unobstructed. Made from lightweight materials with the sleeper’s maximum comfort in mind, the chin strap has helped thousands of men (and their tormented wives) get the sleep that their bodies have always needed at night.

MySnoringSolution is so sure the chin strap will solve all of your man’s sleep apnea troubles, no matter what your reason, you have 90 days to return the chin strap and get a full refund of your money (so you basically risk nothing by trying this out).

It’s not just about getting a full night’s sleep for your man and you — it’s about getting to sleep in a way that is comfortable for him. Check out MySnoringSolution now, get a good night’s sleep at last and end your snoring problems once and for all!

(Celebrity News) Sofia Vergara Poses In Bikini Bottoms On The Cover Of Shape Magazine

                                        

                                          Sofia Vergara is 42 and absolutely fabulous.

The "Modern Family" actress stuns in Shape magazine's November issue as she rocks a black bikini with a plunging top and, of course, her famous smile. Vergara opens up about feeling comfortable in her skin and embracing her figure.

"I was always very happy with what I have. I mean, like any woman I'd complain that my thighs were too big or whatever, but I felt comfortable with my curves –- people expected me to have them," she tells Shape. "Then I hit 40 and started seeing a softness everywhere on my body… I knew it was time to do something.”

Vergara has been using the Megaformer machine, which is based on Pilates and the Strengthen, Lengthen and Tone philosophy. She also lifts free weights and drinks vegetable juices. Her motto? "No pain, no cake!"

For more with Sofia Vergara, head over to Shape.com and pick up the November issue on Thursday.

(Celebrity News) Stars on the Move: Jay Z and Beyonce, Diddy, Kim Kardashian and Kanye West

                       Word on the street is that even Jay Z and Beyonce pay rent.

    It looks like Jay Z and Beyonce leased an ultra-modern Holmby Hills, California, mansion for a month-long stay over the summer, according to Variety.

It's hard to imagine a house suitable for these two celebs, but this one seems to fit the fab bill. The three-level contemporary estate has floor-to-ceiling windows, offering panoramic views of the surrounding area. The home also has a luxurious living room with 20-foot-high ceilings and glass walls, prime for any fabulous night of entertaining. Other impressive amenities include a custom-tiled infinity pool, landscaped gardens, outdoor kitchen and a tennis court.

So, what's the rent for an uber-luxe 16,000-square-foot home like this one? Variety says that Jay and Bey paid a cool $200K for their retreat at the resort-like property. No big deal.

The seven-bedroom, 8.5-bathroom home was built this year and was listed back in May for a whopping $45 million. According to property records, the home was taken off the market just a few days ago.

    Diddy splashed out some serious cash this week for a home in Holmby Hills.

 In an off-market deal, Sean John Combs, aka Diddy, picked up a newly constructed estate for $40 million, according to the L.A. Times.

There is plenty of room to host any number of guests at his new crib, which has eight bedrooms and 11 bathrooms and spans 17,000 square feet. Maybe the Grammy Award-winning artist will invite some of his noteworthy neighbors to one of his parties; some of the locals include Napster cofounder Sean Parker and Hugh Hefner over at the Playboy Mansion.

The $40 million price tag probably didn't hurt Diddy's bank account too badly; this year, Forbes estimated the rapper's net worth to be $700 million.

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are looking to ditch their digs.

The famous duo is aiming to unload some real estate, according to Variety. The couple scooped up the property back in 2013 for $9 million, and after extensive renovations they are now looking to get $11 million for the abode in an off-market sale.

The Tuscan Mediterranean estate has five bedrooms and seven bathrooms, which would have been plenty of space for baby No. 2. The gorgeous manse is bursting with character and detail, with beamed ceilings, leaded windows and black walnut parquet flooring. There is also a living room with a cathedral ceiling and a stone fireplace, perfect for hosting guests. An elevator goes to the second floor of the home, which has a master suite complete with balconies and picturesque views. The gated estate is located in the community of Bel Air Crest, California.

Kimye, good luck on the sale of the home and on trying to give North West a baby brother or sister!

(News) Apple’s gold iPad and new Macs to launch on 16 October

Apple is to unveil new iPads and new Mac computers on 16th October at its California HQ.

The new gadgets could go on sale on the 24 October - with new Mac software, called Yosemite, available as a free download even earlier.  

Last week, rumours suggested Apple was putting the finishing touches to a new version of it's iPad Air - including a gold version. 

In addition to a redesigned speaker grille, the unit also sports a small hole where the mute/orientation lock switch appears on existing iPad units. 

The move is thought to be designed to boost sales of its full-size tablets, which are in decline.

Until now, iPads have only been available in a monochromatic colour scheme, but a golden makeover would make the tablets more similar to the Californian company’s new iPhone 6 and iPhone 6 Plus, which come in three colours. 

An apparent mockup of a slightly redesigned, next-generation iPad Air has surfaced from Vietnam                   showing a more trim profile, recessed volume buttons, and the addition of                                                                        a Touch ID sensor to the home button. 

                                        The iPads have a new sleek design and are thinner

New versions of the 9.7-inch tablet could include a golden metal rear cover as well as the silver and grey currently offered for the iPad Air, ‘people familiar with the matter’ told Bloomberg.

The new iPads are also predicted to sport a thinner, more rounded design, similar to the iPhone 6.

Hidden code in the latest iOS 8.1 beta software hints that the iPads will feature a Touch ID fingerprint sensor and Apple Pay functionality.  

The code states that users can 'pay with iPad using Touch ID. With Apple Pay, you no longer need to type card numbers and shipping information.'

However, it is not clear whether the new iPad will come with NFC functionality, which is used for contactless payments, as it relies on a Wi-Fi or mobile connection. 

Apple Pay has only been announced in the US, so if the iPads do get the feature, it may be limited to only American buyers.  

Apple is also rumoured to be launching a larger iPad with a 12.9-inch screen next year, which if true, could offer 76 per cent more screen area than the current 9.7 inch models.

The latest swathe of Apple tablets could come with a split screen function, which would allow users of an iPad to open two apps side-by-side on one screen. 

Sales of iPads have slumped for two quarters, after climbing from $5 billion (£3 billion) when they were launched in 2010, to $30 billion (£19 billion) in 2012 and $32 billion in 2013 (£20 billion).

(News) Apple planning 'smart paper' to replace tablets? Patent reveals double-sided flexible screen

    Apple has patented a flexible display screen that could one day be used to create digital magazines and billboards.

The patent describes a 'digital periodical' that can also double as an in store sign or billboard.

It is controlled by simply flexing or bending the display, and information can be sent to it via mobile phone networks. 

The patent was one of 31 US Patent and Trademark Office newly granted patents for Apple Inc. today.

A mobile electronic device having a flexible display device is disclosed,' the application says,

a request to retrieve information from a server over a wireless network is triggered based on flexing the flexible display device and other gestures. '

'This could be a revolutionary new Apple device that they refer to as a digital periodical' said Patently Apple, which analysed the application

How it could work

Firms such as Samsung are already developing foldable screen technology.

Apple's version has a housing on each side.

Rather that buttons, it is controlled simply by flexing the paper.

The system can also link to mobile phone networks to download new content to display

(MOUTH DROPPING) School teacher captures amazing up-close photo of great white shark while cage diving in South Africa

A schoolteacher from New Jersey has returned from her trip to South Africa with a remarkable up-close photo of a great white shark that has been making waves on social media.

Amanda Brewer, 25, an art teacher from Gloucester County, traveled halfway across the world to volunteer as a scientific data collector for White Shark Africa - an organization dedicated to animal conservation and eco-tourism.

Brewer, a lifelong shark enthusiast and amateur photographer, was enjoying cage diving in Mossel Bay off Seal Island one day hoping to catch a glimpse of the much-maligned sea creatures - and she didn’t have to wait long.

Cue 'Jaws' muisc: Amanda Brewer, 25, an art teacher from New Jersey, took this incredible picture while cage diving in Mossel Bay, South Africa

Shark selfie: Brewer, pictured here with a much smaller shark, traveled to Africa to volunteer as a scientific data collector for White Shark Africa

Upon her return home, Brewer hung her now-famous picture of the shark with its mouth agape in her classroom at Whitman Elementary School in Washington Township to inspire her young students.

The vivid snapshot has been shared thousands of times on social media sites and has been the subject of fawning news articles, blog posts and TV segments.

But Brewer also has been subjected to criticism from shark advocates over the use of bait in the taking of the photo.

Speaking to GrindTV, the New Jersey educator explained that the fish heads used to lure the shark were pulled around and out of the way of the cage to make sure the sea creature didn't lunge and the steel bars.

‘That’s one thing that we learned right off the bat, is that you never want the shark to make contact with the cage,’ she noted.

‘And you also don’t want the shark to eat the bait. You don’t feed the sharks; that’s not what we want to do.’

Brewer added that the fish-eye lens on her camera made the shark appear closer to her than it was in reality, which was about 3 feet from the cage.

She said the shark came out of nowhere, and she was simply at the right place and at the right time with her trusty GoPro at the ready.

‘I’d been waiting for this kind of experience my whole life,’ Brewer told LightBox.

The makers of GoPro took notice of Brewer's ringing endorsement of their camera and featured her photo on their Twitter account, which helped the shark-tastic snapshot go viral.

(Bizarre )Man wants to trade house for an iPhone 6

One man is so desperate to sell his house in Detroit, he's now willing to swap it for an iPhone 6.

Larry Else told WJBK: "My client, he's from overseas, and he told me he would be willing to trade the property for an iPhone 6. ... It sounds to me like he wants the premium version, but I think he's willing to negotiate."

So what could you get for the price of a new iPhone?

The house, which is currently listed for just $3,000 on Zillow, is around 2,400 square feet in size. It has three bedrooms, one and a half bathrooms, and a finished basement.

Not too shabby. But whoever ends up buying the property would have to spend a sizable chunk of change just making the place habitable. Daily Mail reports the windows are broken, the shutters are smashed and the plants out front are totally overgrown.

When you only have to spend the price of an iPhone 6 -- which is around $650 without a contract, or $750 if you're going to make the owner's dreams come true and trade him the iPhone 6+ -- perhaps spending a little more fixing the place up wouldn't break the bank.

Turns out, the owner of the home has been dropping the asking price periodically these past few months. He's reportedly hoping to get the house sold before other homes close to foreclosure hit the market. ABC says this house itself will be foreclosed next year.

The owner has some competition when it comes to Detroit's housing market. In June, The New York Timescreated an interactive mosaic showing more than 43,000 properties that are close to foreclosure.

It should also be noted that whoever purchases the home will have to pay the back-taxes, which are currently around $6,000.

( NEWS) Gay Marriage Is Upheld in Nevada and Idaho USA.

A federal appeals court on Tuesday struck down same-sex marriage bans in Idaho and in    Nevada, the latest in a nearly unbroken string of courtroom victories for gay couples.

The decision, by the United States Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit, in San Francisco, came a day after the Supreme Court allowed similar rulings by three other appeals courts to stand, clearing the way for same-sex marriage to start immediately in Indiana, Oklahoma, Utah, Virginia and Wisconsin and to be extended soon to six other states in those circuits.

“The lessons of our constitutional history are clear: Inclusion strengthens, rather than weakens, our most important institutions,” Judge Stephen R. Reinhardt wrote in the three-judge panel’s unanimous ruling. “When same-sex couples are married, just as when opposite-sex couples are married, they serve as models of loving commitment to all.”

Tuesday’s decision will lend impetus to marriage-ban challenges in Alaska, Arizona and Montana, which are also in the Ninth Circuit.

Hours later, the appeals court issued mandates to implement the ruling. As a result, Idaho could begin authorizing the marriages this week, although Gov. C. L. Otter said that the court’s decision was “disappointing” and that state officials were evaluating how to respond.

In Nevada, Gov. Brian Sandoval and state Attorney General Catherine Cortez Masto said it could be two weeks before a final order is issued by a United States District Court judge. But at least one county clerk said she would begin issuing the marriage licenses on Wednesday.

The Idaho case was brought by four same-sex couples who were represented by private lawyers and by the National Center for Lesbian Rights. In the Nevada case, several couples were represented by Lambda Legal.

In its decision, the appeals court found that marriage restrictions in Idaho and in Nevada imposed “profound legal, financial, social and psychic harms” on gay couples and their children, and dismissed as “without merit” the assertion by both states that bans on same-sex marriage promote the welfare of children.

“Plaintiffs are ordinary Idahoans and Nevadans,” the court wrote. “Like all human beings, their lives are given greater meaning by their intimate, loving committed relationships with their partners and children.”

The three judges on the panel were appointed by Democratic presidents: Jimmy Carter appointed Judge Reinhardt, and Bill Clinton appointed Judges Ronald M. Gould and Marsha S. Berzon.

With Monday’s Supreme Court decision and Tuesday’s ruling in San Francisco, the number of states authorizing same-sex marriage, which was 19 last week and 24 as of Monday, is likely to approach 35 in coming weeks, as the legal aftermath of the four appeals-court decisions issued to date plays out.

In addition, another federal appeals court, the Sixth Circuit, in Cincinnati, is expected to rule soon on the validity of same-sex marriage bans in Kentucky, Michigan, Ohio and Tennessee.

(LATEST NEWS) Life, Death and Grim Routine Fill the Day at a Liberian Ebola Clinic

SUAKOKO, Liberia — The dirt road winds and dips, passes through a rubber plantation and arrives up a hill, near the grounds of an old leper colony. The latest scourge, Ebola, is under assault here in a cluster of cobalt-blue buildings operated by an American charity, International Medical Corps. In the newly opened treatment center, Liberian workers and volunteers from abroad identify who is infected, save those they can and try to halt the virus’s spread.

It is a place both ordinary and otherworldly. Young men who feel well enough run laps around the ward; acrid smoke wafts from a medical waste incinerator into the expansive tropical sky; doctors are unrecognizable in yellow protective suits; patients who may not have Ebola listen to a radio with those who do, separated by a fence and fresh air.

Here are the rhythms of a single day:

Soon after their arrival, about a half-dozen doctors and nurses gathered near whiteboards for the handoff from the night shift. There were 22 patients, and no deaths overnight. The center — which includes a triage area, a restricted unit for patients suspected of having Ebola infections and another for those in the grip of the disease — is not teeming like some clinics in Monrovia, more than four hours west. It is designed to accommodate up to 70 patients, but it is still scaling up after opening a few weeks ago and has just two ambulances to ferry patients.

An 8-year-old boy had been too weak to lift a liter bottle of oral rehydration solution to his mouth through the night. Bridget Anne Mulrooney, an American nurse, reported that she gave him a smaller bottle and sheets to keep warm. A woman who had lost both her baby and husband to Ebola and was suspected of having the disease herself was refusing food and medications for symptoms and other possible illnesses, such as malaria. A man in his 70s, a talkative staff favorite, was now confused, his sheet covered in blood. He had been admitted four days earlier, but laboratory tests confirming an Ebola diagnosis had not come back yet. “I think he’s positive,” said Dr. Colin Bucks, an American. “I think this will be an end-of-life event.”

Eight patients needed intravenous fluids to combat dehydration. One patient was described as happy. Another was playing cards.

7:40 A.M.

Morning devotion began with a song and clapping, performed in triple time. About 18 local workers, most wearing rubber boots and blue hospital scrubs bleached so often that they were now pastel pink, danced and then prayed for God’s mercy on the treatment unit and those who worked there. Some folded their hands, sheathed in bright-colored gloves, at their heart. In unison, the Liberians sang, “Cover with your protective arms, O God.”

8:10 A.M.

Sean Casey, an American who is the center’s team leader, gathered his department heads for what became a conversation about patient flow. The head of the ambulance crew said five patients with possible Ebola infections were awaiting rides to the center. But the ward with suspected cases was full, Mr. Casey said, and needed to be cleared first. Lab results were required, so patients without Ebola could be discharged and the confirmed cases could be moved to the other ward. The center also had some patients who were ill with other maladies. They should have been transferred to the local hospital, but it offered only limited care since reopening after six nurses died of Ebola.

Continue reading the main story

The managers also discussed labor issues involving the 175-member Liberian staff, some of whom had walked out days before in one of the pay disputes common among the country’s health workers. The leaders and those who abandoned patient care would not be rehired because it was crucial to have a dependable staff, Mr. Casey said. Then he sent everyone off.

(STORY) Tales of Amala !!!!!!

I live in the ruins, the darkest in these parts of our world. My name is Amala and it is this place that I call home. It is a slum worse off than a year’s untidy market with clogged drains and nothing such as potable water or electricity. We live in a place engulfed with so much filth such that the sweet smell that emanates from the nearby lagoon could cause a person to lose track of their way home.

My family is considered one of the best in these parts. It is a four –bedroom shelter with no classy furniture apart from the four traditionally carved stools for use in the kitchen and an old wobbling table which my parents acquired decades before I was born. The bare floors were always ready to accommodate our sleeping mats when night fell and the slits in the thatch roof always gave us a chance to mop the floors after the rains.

In this neighbourhood, most of the homes are blown down by the mere whistling of the winds. The houses are semi-mud with an accompaniment of stones and sea sand unlike the flashy and beautifully built brick houses with water proof paintings and glass doors that belonged to the aristocrats of society. Consistently, the thatch roofs are stacked for fear of being thrown down by the rains.

Morning in this place is like that of ants trouping in search of food in wait of the rainy season. Everyone is busy. The women take time to go about their chores while their husbands take to the routine of collecting used plastic material in return for some money to cover the daily expenditures of their families. Young men who are old enough  help to make additional income by fetching used and faulty appliances known as scrap and selling them out to interested buyers. Young girls carry loads to earn meager amounts.

However, children like me are always enthused about walking miles in search of water which we would bring back to our mothers to be used for domestic work. 

Mothers of Akinto were housewives who would do all the chores with little or no help from their adolescent children. They would then get the evening meal ready for their husbands in time for their return from a hard day’s work. We would fetch water from the algae-clogged taps or broken down pipes near the filthy looking drains. At other times when luck favoured us, a generous passer-by would help us pump water from a raggedy squeaking borehole.

The night workers were clustered at one part of the slum. They would come out at night in skimpy clothes with coloured substances applied on their faces, their lips glowing and sparkling as though they had been soaked in oil. After some time, they would sit in the classy vehicles that pulled up and be gone only to be seen at night the next day. They would sleep all day and would only come out at sundown to tell their friends about their escapades the previous evening. I had developed a liking to their slum luxury; their clothes and hairstyles which they always made sure were classy than the rags we wore. My parents, full of virtue and dignity, always complained about these girls but were not candid enough to tell us why they prevented us from going near them.

One day, after doing our chores we decided to stray a few miles away from home. As we walked through the narrow streets of Akinto, we shared our dreams as to the kind of adults we hoped to be. My best friend Tamil, a girl my age spoke of becoming an elegant lady and actress. She hoped to own so many assets and as she spoke passionately, I began to wander how all this was going to come true. My brother told us how he admired the world of banking. On one of our visits to the capital, he had closely observed the banking halls with particular attention and did not turn even to listen to me when I poked him. I had wondered how to work on my community and the health hazards that posed a threat to our lives; I earnestly prayed to end up as a health personnel and to affect the lives of many people especially those in my place.

Years on, I am standing in my very own Akinto, place of my birth. How time flies. I remember those years like yesterday. My parents could not afford to educate my brother and me. Had it not been for the benevolence of a philanthropist who visited our place; I wonder where I would have been. The schools he enrolled us in channeled a path for us to be near our dreams and his constant visits and words of encouragement helped us forge on.

After some years, Tamil and I took different paths. My brother Sakin continued in pursuit of his lifelong dream, a banker by hook or crook. All those skimpy dressing women now old and visiting my health centres on regular basis. The result of a life carelessly lived. I have learned my lessons well; my parents trained me to be dignified even in poverty and encouraged me to desist from making them friends.

Currently, I am a woman of substance; one of good ethics and character, mother of a girl and boy seated amongst the lot who are here to listen to Amala Kadimi ,native of Akinto. I now look back on those years as training grounds to experience hardship and to overcome it entirely.

 Today, Akinto is clean because of our hardwork. Tamil, Sakin and I as well as the people of Akinto have a clean neighbourhood, potable water and schools to offer. The children attend school and are well endowed to compete with any child anywhere. I’m so glad to be associated with Akinto; land of my birth.